The Deep Know

Greetings, all!  Guess who's back, back again.  Mandi's back!  Tell a friend. . .or two, or five dozen.  Your choice.  No, I do not come to you from Eminem's 8 Mile but from here in Oklahoma where Fall Term 2013 is in full swing.  As I'm nearing the end of my undergraduate career, things are getting real, folks.  Graduation looms large, and the spectre whispers of opportunity, hope, doubt, and the need for introspection.  What goals do I have?  What about graduate studies? What is my next step?

Amid these very important questions, it can be difficult to find a true North, a heading that is reliable.  With these thoughts buzzing inside my cranium, I ran across an article online by the author Ronlyn Domingue that struck a chord with me.  In this article, she talks about about moments of understanding, ephiphanous instances in life where one has what she calls a "Deep Know."  Domingue goes on to describe these Deep Knows, saying:

 "[They are] an insight so profound that being rational makes no sense and intuition is the purest form of logic.  A person feels it in her cells, the manifestation in her gut.  Even now you're thinking about yours.  The moments you just knew."

Dear Cosmos,
Send my epiphany now.  Please
and thanks!  -Mandi

It would be great to be able to conjure one of these moments of profound knowledge at will, no?  "Cosmos!  I am ready for my moment of revelation regarding   X  .  Begin."  Yeah, right.
Unfortunately, these don't come at one's beck and call.

Like Domingue, I have had a couple of Deep Knows myself.  One (Surprise, surprise!) regarded writing and seemed ridiculous when the understanding broke over me.  I sat in front of my archaic Dell desktop a few months into a very rough pregnancy typing up the beginning of what would become an ongoing four year labor of love, my novel.  I surfaced from a long spell of being lost in the creation of a scene that burned in my mind's eye, and in the wake of escape from hormone induced nausea, I realized I was happy.  A happiness that bordered on serenity, on bliss.  The smile faded as the weight of the Know came.  I want to write.  

What had begun as an idea I couldn't shake being indulged at the keyboard filtered into an understanding on a mitochondrial level that this was it.  It made no sense, and it scared the ever loving bajeezus out of me.  "I can't write.  Why on Earth would I think that I should write?  I'm probably horrible.  I love my idea, but people would probably hate it or think it's ridiculous.  It's just an idea, after all, and it takes A LOT of words to make a book.  Should I try?"  Despite the self-doubt and fear, I wanted to try, and I knew I would.  In some ways, it wasn't an option but a compulsion.  I had to write.  And so my manuscript progressed through my pregnancy, through motherhood, through divorce, through healing, through returning to school and learning to be a better writer.

It's never left me, this knowledge about writing.  I want to teach.  I love helping others find their voice as a writer, to hone their craft, to find confidence to express themselves.  Tutoring allows me to do this, and teaching offers the same opportunity on a larger scale.  I want to teach, but I will write.  I must write.  This is enough for me for now.  I have question marks in the air about grad school, about the success of my current manuscript, but not about writing.

I've learned that in order to follow and honor this Deep Know as Domingue talks about, I need to write.  To write, I need time.  Time is something I do not have oodles of, so in order to keep up the writing, there are a few things I've learned to do and think.

1.  Take It with You and Use Downtime

I take one of two things with me most days.  One is a notebook, and the other is my iPad with a bluetooth keyboard.  In the gaps between classes, I have what I need to get some work done.  I find an empty classroom, a table in the frigid library, a somewhat comfy bench, or a random chair and get after it.  

2.  Auxiliary Writing Tasks

Sometimes, the words just don't come, or they come in a begrudging, leaden way.  Sometimes, I get stuck.  Do I just put things away and go check my Facebook or Twitter? (You should follow me by the way @MandiMcRay!)  If I'm being honest, I do but not super often.  If the words won't come or a certain scene is thumbing its nose at me, I make use of my in-between moments to do what I like to call Auxiliary Writing Tasks.

After seeing this meme from author Sami Lee, I think
I should expand the scope of my research.  

I do research: for plot details, over publishing news/trends, over marketing advice, over writing advice in general.  I don't have to tell you that there is an overwhelming amount of information about close to everything on the web these days.  Naturally, there's info to be had about the craft of writing, getting published, query letters, writing a good synopsis, what an agent is looking for, ways to build your platform, the benefits of joining Twitter (Did I mention yet that you should follow me?  @MandiMcRay . . .just in case you missed it before), and a myriad of different ways to evaluate and improve your work.  A filter and common sense are necessary, but there are good resources out there, free for the reading.

I also do outline, detail, and connection checks.  Pulling out my working outline, I consider pacing, order, plot momentum as well as check for plot holes and missing details or connections that I may or may not have mentioned.  Things that help round out a character's motivation or create a link where one needs to be but isn't yet can pop up and smack you in the face during these moments.  Doing this also helps keep me at least somewhat inserted in my story even when I'm not able to work toward a scene's completion or find the right dialogue.  Often, the clouds of writer's block will clear a bit while doing this review and note making, and I'll find myself able to get back to the actual work of writing once again.  

Another thing I've recently discovered is the reviewing and tweaking of my synopsis.  A good synopsis is a vital thing.  It's one of the major pieces that a writer includes when querying an agent, so it's important to say the least.  Aside from its importance, it's also a useful tool to whip out when working on your manuscript.  I find it helpful when I want to take a step back and look at the big picture of my story line.  Can I easily see the plotting of my story arc? Am I shoving too much action into one area or possibly letting one stretch string along without enough happening or developing?  My synopsis helps me see how the puzzle pieces are fitting together from a concise, bird's eye view.  

3.  Sleep is optional

May or may not resemble me
in the morning. . .at least
before coffee.

The final thing I found helpful is the realization that large quantities of sleep are super great, but optional.  I'm not saying stay up for 56 hours and push, push, push on that draft until you keel over and need to be resuscitated via caffeine, chest compressions, or both.  Definitely, do NOT do that.  However, if you find you are able to work on six hours of sleep instead of the recommended eight, you might consider staying up a bit later or getting up a bit earlier to get some work done before the craziness of the day descends.  I have learned through brutal experience that I am not a morning person.  I am, however, a rather productive night owl.  The midnight oil and I can get along swimmingly.  Important Note: I do not recommend skimping on sleep when caring for very young children.  Getting up every two hours to take care of an infant took precedence over any thought I had of written creativity for quite a while.  Above all, take care of yourself.  That goes without saying, but I say it anyway.  Sleep.  Please, sleep.  Stay healthy.  Write when and where you can.  We cool on that?  Golden.

So, to sum up: If you've had your Deep Know about writing (or anything else creative or career related), tell me about it in the comments below!  Oh, and follow it, of course.  Feel free to use the tips I've suggested, or find an entirely new set that suits you and your writing habits.  

Have a wonderful day and a splendid week, and don't wake me up early.  If the meme above isn't warning enough, you need a cranium check.  

Did I mention I've joined Twitter?  No?  Well, I have.  @MandiMcRay.  Follow me!  I'm funny or at least try to be, and I follow funny, insightful, interesting people.  Doesn't get much better than that. . .unless you add coffee to the mix, but that goes without saying.  Know the Deepness, convey truth, and write!  

The E-Word

Let's say you've written something. M'kay?  It's not that far of a stretch.  You're a human being who has had some type of formal education, presumably.  You also have access to the internet since you're reading this.  If you're reading this without internet access, then we need to talk, Secret Agent Person.  Teach me!  As you're linked up to this technological Autobahn we call the internet, I'm also going to take a wild, flying guess and say that you have written emails, Facebook messages, and the like as well.  Basically, if you are human and you are literate, you write things.  Some of these things are for yourself (e.g. shopping lists, to-do lists, or like me, to-do lists for items on your to-list) and some are for other human beings to read.  Poetry, papers for school, short stories, novellas, novels, short answer essay questions for tests, job applications, cover letters, resumes, and letters or emails to individuals, companies, editors of your local newspaper:  all of these make up the body of writing to which we contribute in our lives.  

Writing is meant to be read by someone else.  The only writing that does not follow this rule is personal, private journal entries.  The other someone who reads your writing, your audience, is going to heavily determine how and what you write, but once you have written what you want your audience to read, there is another step you should take before sending, submitting, mailing, or publishing what you've written.  It's the E-word, and I've seen grown adults quail at the thought of submitting themselves to it.  Come a little closer.  

It's called. . . . Editing!

Recent research proves this expression
is insanely common for those
 engaged in editing.  

Why, Sly?  Why?!

I know.  So daunting!  Such a pain, a chore, a task to be abhorred! Editing can be and is a challenging thing to undertake sometimes, but it's not nearly as frightening as the changes wrought upon Sly Stalone's face by his relationship with Human Growth Hormone.  Just saying. . .things could be worse, folks.







As I've shared with you all, I'm currently finishing up my BA in English Education.  I'm also a tutor in my university's writing center.  I figure if I'm going to make a living teaching kids to write, it might help to have some hands on experience under my belt before I dive into my own classroom.  Baptism of fire is great and all that, but it's also rather terrifying.  Additionally, one is likely to come out a tad singed in some cases.  I prefer myself non-singed, so I clock hours helping fellow college students become better writers and produce better written work.  I love it, and it's addicting.

Since I'm a writing tutor, I can report to you from the front lines of the struggle that every writer goes through when they craft something made of words.  I can assure you that after the valiant contest to just GET something on paper, every writer cringes at the thought of going back through and editing their own work.  Editing is one of the challenges of the writing process, but there are somethings I've learned in my time as a tutor that have helped me and helped me help others when it comes to the tasks of writing and editing.  Ready to read about 'em?  They can help you make your decent writing good and your good writing even better! 

Here are some suggestions from my personal experience.  Enjoy!

1.  It's All About the Hard Copy.

For real.  Print off a copy of whatever it is you've written.  This makes editing a lot easier.  For some reason, seeing the words on paper can help you notice mistakes and other issues that more easily go unnoticed when they're on the screen of your favorite word processor.  If your printer has the ability to print front and back, I recommend using that option.  It gets the job done and saves paper.  The rain forests will thank you!

2.  Read That Stuff Out Loud.

This is an invaluable tool that I've learned since becoming a writing tutor.  When you read silently over something that you've written, your mind tends to read it like you meant it instead of how you wrote it.  I do this all the time.  By reading my work aloud, it forces my mind to hear it as well as see it, and that allows me to recognize typos, grammar mistakes, misspellings, and the like much more readily.  When read aloud, these oopses stand out like sore thumbs.  I have a tendency to sometimes double up on prepositions or conjunctions if I pause after one while thinking through how I want to end my sentence.  This results in something like, "I went to the store before he did because because it was important."  See what I did there?  I drives me crazy!  I do it at least two to three times in every paper I write, but reading my draft aloud helps me catch those darn double ups.

3.  Grab a Writing Utensil and USE IT!

  I'm serious.  Grab your favorite pencil or pen and wield it to your little heart's content.  Write comments, put questions marks by areas that don't make sense, or leave instructions for yourself (e.g. "Clarify this," "More explanation here!" "Check grammar," "Ick! Rephrase.").  Mark typos, misspellings, and other errors to correct when you're done marking up your draft.  This is why a print off can be so helpful.  You're able to jot, scribble, and write with abandon, and you can also better spot recurring patterns of errors.  Spotting = Awareness and 

Awareness = Lower Likelihood of Repeating Said Errors.  Always a plus!

4.  Check the Flow, Man. . .

Look at how your writing flows from one idea to another.  How does it sound?  Smooth, scrambled, choppy, or elegantly eloquent?  If scrambled or choppy come to mind,  check your transitions from paragraph to paragraph.  Smooth transitions give your readers an easy ride through your writing instead of a bumpy, pot-holed jaunt that leaves them feeling tired. Writing that flows well can be a joy to read while a piece that makes you work to follow it can be an exercise in perseverance.  

5.  Fix Stuff.

Here is where you get to implement all the great insights you stumbled upon while reading your printed draft out loud while fearlessly marking as you see fit!  Exciting stuff, I know.  This is another reason that using a printed draft can help in the editing process.  Once you have marked up your draft, you now have a road map to follow when navigating the digital file on your computer as you make changes.  I plan to do this on a large scale once I finish the manuscript of my novel.  It makes me tremble in both terror and excitement to think of working my way through a piece of writing this size; however, a writer's gotta do what a writer's gotta do, and a writer's job is to present their work to readers in a form as correct and clear as possible.  It's about reaching your reader, after all.  

There are more specific and different steps that I take when editing depending on whether I'm writing an academic paper or a piece of creative work, and I do believe I'll discuss those in another blog post.  Tips and suggestions are helpful, but I have learned several general things via my life as a tutor so far.  One of which is that tutoring can make you feel like a superhero for small moments.  Given that, I probably need to come up with a name for my superhero alter-ego; however, that's neither here nor there.  More importantly and more applicably, I have also learned that tutors are coaches as much as they are grammar/punctuation/syntax freaks, and a good coach knows when to call it good during a given session.  I'm calling it good for now.  Overload and overkill can undo lots of quality, hard work.  Let's avoid treading that unfortunate road, shall we?  I think it prudent, and this is my blog; therefore, we part here for now, O Reader.

Hopefully, this little list has been helpful, informative, entertaining, or at least boredom reducing in some capacity.  If you have trouble working through this list, periodically scroll back up to look at Sly's HGH augmented face.  That'll shock you back into consciousness.  Once coherent again, let me know 1) what tips or strategies YOU employ when editing and 2) any suggestions you might have for my super-tutor-hero name.  I'm coming up empty.  Until next time, here's a writerly blessing for you all:

May your quill never run dry.  May random keys on your keyboard never fink out.  May your documents never NOT save, and may the muses never fail to visit as you work to convey the truth you see about you. 

Type and/or scribble happily, my friends!

Old House Shoes

Howdy, all!  I know. I know.  It's been rather a stretch between my inaugural post and this one; however, in my defense, I was occupied taking care of business when it came to finishing up spring term.  That is in the bag, though, and that brings me to another reason I've been tardy in connecting with you, O Reader, via text.  Summer time.

When one thinks of summer, they normally think of hot, lazy days which are inevitably followed by long, warm evenings that seemingly stretch on forever before melting into star specked nights whose skies host fireflies and cricket songs.  I thought this, too. . .until I remembered I'm a mom, and I still have stuff to write during the break!  I plan to thoroughly enjoy the above described seasonal ideal at every single opportunity, but I'm also going to have to balance my writing demands with my son's first T-ball season, his swimming lessons, cleaning/reorganizing his room (*ahem* and mine) as well as other family demands that are coming down the pike.  But none of this has anything to do with the title for this post.  Time to refocus.

My house shoes. My love.

In the week or so since I finished the spring term, we've had some lovely springtime, Tornado Alley-esque weather, and by that I mean, we've gotten to glue our eyes to the TV to see when exactly we should take cover from the rotation developing in the sky.  So fun! *Please note sarcasm*  Lots of rain and some unseasonably cooler temperatures have come along with this current weather pattern, so though it is April, I've had the opportunity and beloved necessity of slipping my perpetually chilly feet into my favorite house shoes (and also possibly walking around the house in my blue plaid, fleece robe, though if pressed, I'll deny this.  You have no proof!) Seriously, these house shoes are close to THE BEST thing in the history of things.  If I had to choose between coffee, indoor plumbing, heated leather car seats, and these shoes, I might just dissolve into a crying, teeth gnashing mess.  All hyperbole aside, they're awesome, folks.

And what are these wonderful shoes, you might ask?  They're the Wicked Good Moccasins from L. L. Bean, man.  I love 'em.  The way they make my feet feel when I slip into them turns me into a Jewish mother from the SNL skit Coffee Talk with Linda Richman.  "These shoes are like buttah!  I'm a little verklempt!  Talk amongst yourselves.  Let me give you a topic:  These shoes are neither wicked nor good.  They're GREAT! Discuss. . . ."

Mike Meyers = Comic Genius.  The End.

Sorry, I was beginning to drift off to listen to some Streisand on YouTube, but I'm back.

As I was saying, these house shoes are so comfortable, so warm, so practical, so Me.  So you can imagine my surprise when today I opened up my writing folder on my Mac and started sorting back through my novel material, reorienting myself after my few weeks of absence with my outline of scenes and what needs to be worked on, and I got that same buttah feeling.  Taking a small step back into my little creative world was akin to slipping my mind into a metaphorical pair of Wicked Goods.  It was delicious.  I was home. Everyone has that, I suppose, or at least they should.  What's your old house shoe space, Reader?  Let me know in the comments, but let's keep it PG, y'all.  Normally, I wouldn't think of needing to say that, but during a recent experience with helping teach a college writing course, I discovered that it's better to set some parameters than trust people will not draw inappropriate pictures of the female body as part of a class activity.  Don't ask.  Long story.  I gaped in shock and blushed five shades of crimson, I assure you.

Post three is already in the works, so I do not see the space between this post and the next being nearly as long as that between this one and the first.  Enjoy the rest of your weekend, and find some time to enjoy your own house shoe space, whatever it may be.

My name is Mandi. Call me Hamlet.

Now that I've introduced myself, I suppose I should explain what I mean by that.

I'll begin with a confession.  I'm on my way to being an English teacher, and I want to write. Perhaps that's not shocking enough to be called "confessional," but that's as good as it's going to get for now.  I mean, seriously. . .we just met.  On second thought, that combination of education and fiction writing isn't anything snazzy in itself.  Stephen King taught high school English, all the while pounding away furiously on a typewriter in the small laundry room of the house he and his family shared in the days before he was a publishing powerhouse.  Side note:  Check out his On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft if you want to write, know a writer, like writers, or just enjoy running your eyes across letters grouped into words which form sentences.  You'll thank me.  But I digress. . .I was confessing, sort of.

Now, I have never met Mr. King nor have I ever corresponded with him in any manner, but I do much the same as he once did, except at a kitchen table on a Macbook in the spare time that I can eke out between writing papers over literature, learning the theory behind the science/art that is education, and being a single mother.  And this is where the Hamlet part comes in.  I promise I didn't make you do a double take when you read the title of my inaugural post for nothing.  Intrepid Reader, fear not.  I'll make the connection for you.  I don't write post-modern fiction. So back to my reference regarding Shakespeare's Danish prince.

Hamlet: Indecisive and nutty.

Hamlet provides a wealth of material to sort through when you look at him, but one thing for which he's best known is his indecision.  At the beginning of the play, the ghost of his recently dead father, who was king of Denmark, confronts Hamlet with the scandalous truth surrounding his sudden kicking of the bucket.  Royal Dad Ghost reveals it was his own brother who poisoned him before snatching the throne and his dead brother's widow.  Oh, snap!  Drama!  See?  Shakespeare was Jerry Springer before Jerry Springer was cool. . .except Shakespeare was a genius.  Moving on. . . Royal Dad Ghost charges Hamlet with exacting revenge on Creepo Uncle and then disappears.  No advice.  No instructions.  Just a command and *poof* gone.  Hamlet has to map his own course, and the mud begins to thicken immediately.  At one point, he has the opportunity to kill the crown grabber but doesn't because ol' Uncle Dearest is praying and would die forgiven.  Forigven = heaven, and Hamlet is decidedly not down with that.  Hamlet's a bitter chap.  'Tis true.  The play is a tragedy, so pretty much everyone ends up dead by the end.  It's possible, though, that things could have been different had Hamlet pounced on the option of a dead but forgiven uncle.


Here's where I tie in.  I've been pursuing my English degree for a little over two years and have been working on a novel for the past four.  I'm getting incredibly close to finishing it, so naturally I'm interested in what happens after the manuscript is finished.  I'm researching how I can make my work the best it can be, how I can hone my skills as a writer and marketer of my work (both scholastic and creative), and how I can create a platform that will allow people to hear about what I've written.  If they don't hear about it, how can they buy it, read it, fall in love with it, and tell EVERY PERSON THEY KNOW about it?  I have only a finite number of years before I'll have a kid to put through college, folks.  I'd rather write books that people buy than resort to a Kickstarter project, but that's just me.

One of the things I keep hearing as I wade through my research is a term I mentioned above.  Platform. Platform. Platform.  Develop your writer's platform.  Put yourself out there.  Be your own brand.  Network.  Connect.  Blog.  Tweet.  Give me a moment to let my head stop spinning.  Lots of information and not a little insecurity equals a frozen Mandi.  I'm Hamlet.  I know what I should do, but I'm leery of doing it wrong and embarrassing myself far beyond the level I did in seventh grade when, during a school Christmas program, my velvety dress clung to my pantyhose as I got up from where my class sat on the gymnasium floor, and I proceeded to walk out in front of God and everyone to sing with my friends about the Christ child while exposing nearly the entirety of my right thigh and buttock.  I still loathe pantyhose to this day.  I believe this may be why.

The bane of my middle school existence.

Bottom line:  Up to this point, Indecision has sat upon me.  He's a morbidly obese little twerp, and it's nearly impossible to move, let alone breathe, while he's squishing you.  Today, right now, as I type,  I'm evicting him.  I'm starting *drum roll, please* A BLOG!  In the grand scheme of things, this might be relatively tiny, but it's a step.  It's a decision and action upon it.  For whatever reason, Hamlet didn't act when he could have, and he lost the opportunity to achieve what he wanted.

In this little space on the interwebs, I'll be discussing things about both creative and academic writing.  I'll attempt to paint for you a picture of my life among characters, both the basic ones on my keyboard that I use to create and punctuate papers for school as well as the characters, the people, that exist only inside my head for now.  If you know me, like me, loathe me, or happen to have stumbled across this blog while fighting boredom, I hope you'll stick around and join me.